Sep 23, 2009

Pressed But Not Destroyed...

Well I remember that scripture when we are pressed but not destroyed well I feel like I am pretty close. I am doing my daily bible devotions and get an attack from you know who isnt it funny I am being sarcastic here but when you are doing your best. When out of no where pow right in the face. An unexpected punch caught completely off guard then what do I do well I punch right back but not at him with scripture. No that would be the correct thing to do I am not there yet instead I go after my husband who once again has overdrawn our account so now not only are we overdrawn in his account but now in our account. You know the one where we opened so we could save money cashing my checks so now instead of saving money we are spending that rare commodity that we both work so hard for and struggle to keep. I am literally beside myself we barely have enough money and I know that I have to let him fall if thats what it takes but unlike the captain of the ship I am fighting tooth and nail to try and stay afloat. Help me please give me the strength that I need to carry on and another thing he found my medication again so now I have no idea except maybe to keep it at work and there for sure no one will be able to get it. Has anyone ever jumped from the frying pan into the fire I really have no one to blame but myself I am the one who got myself into this mess and now there is no way out until death do us part. I just needed to vent and hopefully will do the right thing another day I will tell you this dying is truly painful and my flesh is stronger then I give it credit for. Its not going easy I really need a lot of prayer please if anyone reads this post just simply pray for me and all of this gunk and junk I have in me that when I get squeezed just oozes out so easily. I know that sometimes God turns on the fire to purify us but sometimes we do the job ourselves and either way it hurts.

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maybe its Rudy

maybe its Rudy

Buddy with a volley ball

Buddy with a volley ball